tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1937194102446307830.post865605554900482876..comments2024-03-03T01:47:45.961-08:00Comments on White Sugar, Brown Sugar: Who's That Child?White Sugar Brown Sugar by Rachel Garlinghousehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17573930066994411269noreply@blogger.comBlogger13125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1937194102446307830.post-77405444232311586602009-10-28T22:16:01.105-07:002009-10-28T22:16:01.105-07:00I actually laughed out loud. What nerve that waitr...I actually laughed out loud. What nerve that waitress has asking such a train of personal questions. I belong to the bethany forum, too. I'm an adult adoptee and I am Hispanic, my parents are White. I really can relate to what you're talking about. We've dealt with dumb questions like these since forever. The crib part was hysterical. <br /><br />-Suzanne<br />(No Parking)Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01667457608143384912noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1937194102446307830.post-15026430921864832742009-10-22T17:10:50.083-07:002009-10-22T17:10:50.083-07:00Look at that--I totally forgot that I had said I w...Look at that--I totally forgot that I had said I was done commenting! :)glenna marshallhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18348224654818247656noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1937194102446307830.post-69924541625315569952009-10-22T16:45:17.816-07:002009-10-22T16:45:17.816-07:00Good thoughts, Linda. We're pretty hard core ...Good thoughts, Linda. We're pretty hard core on our view of lessening the importance of our different races and increasing importance on there being no difference between us before God. That's just our stance, though, and while I know the rest of the world will view us/my son/our family unit with different lenses, we're okay with that. But, I do agree with you that we should glenna marshallhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18348224654818247656noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1937194102446307830.post-60423160048430735232009-10-22T15:01:44.835-07:002009-10-22T15:01:44.835-07:00And, sorry, p.s. That doesn't mean that my so...And, sorry, p.s. That doesn't mean that my son should walk around like a victim (or waiting to be a victim); however, it does mean that I want him to be empowered in case he needs it.Unknownhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01563853746617667346noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1937194102446307830.post-48238084216985679012009-10-22T14:53:44.124-07:002009-10-22T14:53:44.124-07:00Sorry, one last food for thought....
I can respec...Sorry, one last food for thought....<br /><br />I can respect that you want to "emphasize and affirm [your son's] Christian heritage rather than racial heritage"; however, I also know that out in the world, there are many people out there who will not look at our children and say/think "Ahhhh, he/she is a man/woman/child of Christian/Jewish/Buddhist/Hindi/Muslim/[insert your Unknownhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01563853746617667346noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1937194102446307830.post-14013084451586607782009-10-22T08:03:45.708-07:002009-10-22T08:03:45.708-07:00Linda,
Yes, that does makes sense. And I think yo...Linda,<br />Yes, that does makes sense. And I think you're right in pointing out that we should be proactive and talk about these things with our children at times OTHER than when we're accosted by a nosy stranger. I don't want the only time we talk with our son about this to be after someone's asked too many personal questions. We will talk about it as often as we need to.<br glenna marshallhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18348224654818247656noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1937194102446307830.post-35539440763551488922009-10-21T21:41:40.325-07:002009-10-21T21:41:40.325-07:00I may be wrong about this, but I think you (Glenna...I may be wrong about this, but I think you (Glenna) and I are coming from slightly different points in parenting. My son is 8 and very conscious of what is said or asked about his ethnicity and/or adoption...it sounds like your son may still be young enough to not be so conscious. Again, in general, I try not to be rude to people; however, there are some people out there who can be so Unknownhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01563853746617667346noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1937194102446307830.post-68714798118975667522009-10-21T15:47:32.060-07:002009-10-21T15:47:32.060-07:00Perhaps that's true, and I reserve the right n...Perhaps that's true, and I reserve the right not to answer someone's question. I might simply say, "That's a personal question." Or, "when my son is old enough to answer that question, I'll let him tell his story if he so chooses." But always with grace. Sure, some people will be unconscionably rude or personal. In those cases, though, I don't want to glenna marshallhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18348224654818247656noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1937194102446307830.post-76830485421553794322009-10-20T19:27:59.339-07:002009-10-20T19:27:59.339-07:00I am not suggesting that one should be rude in any...I am not suggesting that one should be rude in any way; however, it is not my job or my son's job to educate the nosy. We've had people come up and ask completely inappropriate questions...it would be like me going up to a complete stranger and asking them (in front of their child) how many times they had sex before they conceived. My son's adoption story is HIS story and the story Unknownhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01563853746617667346noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1937194102446307830.post-9182920296487524612009-10-20T15:11:51.260-07:002009-10-20T15:11:51.260-07:00But I also think it's important to TEACH our c...But I also think it's important to TEACH our children how to respond graciously to the "nosy strangers". They will have more opportunities than us, probably, to respond...so I think we should teach them to do it well and with grace. Otherwise, it smacks of bitterness which is just not what I want to convey. I'm very thankful for my interracial family, but first and foremost, glenna marshallhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18348224654818247656noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1937194102446307830.post-2652973560615509852009-10-20T11:07:13.207-07:002009-10-20T11:07:13.207-07:00Of course, especially as our children get older, I...Of course, especially as our children get older, I think it's more important to respect our children and their rights and feelings than a nosy stranger.Unknownhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01563853746617667346noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1937194102446307830.post-18150773417911529062009-10-19T07:39:42.795-07:002009-10-19T07:39:42.795-07:00I think people just struggle with how to react to ...I think people just struggle with how to react to something "different." I used to want to be sarcastic about it, but that's unkind, and is it not at all Christ-like. I want to always allow my conversations to be "seasoned with salt," if you will, and biting someone's head off simply because they respond poorly is not an appropriate response in my book. <br />I'glenna marshallhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18348224654818247656noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1937194102446307830.post-35322773191226315232009-10-13T19:48:11.274-07:002009-10-13T19:48:11.274-07:00When asked if you adopted her after already tellin...When asked if you adopted her after already telling her that she was your daughter...ummm....I'd would have been compelled to pull out the sarcasm card. DUH is right. But of course that would not have been productive, I know. You handled it very well. And yes, I agree, she is beautiful! Can't wait to see her again.Shelleyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15970900624010115206noreply@blogger.com