Thursday, August 8, 2013


It drives me crazy when people make (well-intentioned) comments about my family, comments that reduce my children to less-than.

"They are so lucky to have you as their parents!"

"You gave them a good, loving home!"

etc. etc.

I talk a bit about this in my book (see pages 5-6):  the idea that adoptive parents are saviors of poor, needy children who "need a good home."  The belief that children need a savior is amplified in transracial adoption.     

The truth is that we adopted for one very selfish reason:  we wanted to be parents.

Last week I read this eye-opening, clap-your-hands-and-shout-amen blog post by an adoptee.  I encourage you to take a few minutes to read it.

And for more information on the adoptee perspective, pick up books by Sherrie Eldridge.

The truth is, it's WE (the parents) who are the lucky ones.   Our lives are enhanced by the presence of our children.  In many ways, they saved us.  

1 comment:

  1. I could not agree more! I LOVE this post! My husband and I constantly here about how lucky our boys are, etc...they (and their birthmothers) are a blessing to US!!!!


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