Wednesday, December 14, 2011


As if you didn't already know...

I'm a type A lady.  I like projects and accomplishing projects.   Give me a task and consider it done.   I'm organized, punctual, and reliable. 

But, this doesn't always serve me well in life, particularly when it comes to the enjoyment of parenting.  

Recently, I helped co-host a baby shower for one of my friends.  At the shower, each guest wrote a bit of advice and some well-wishes on a card for the expectant mother; we took turns reading the advice aloud.   As each woman, almost all of them mothers and some also grandmothers, shared their advice, there was clearly a common thread being formed.   

Enjoy your baby.  Stare at your baby.  Kiss your baby.  Rock your baby.    Sleep with your baby.

It is so easy for the mother of a growing family to forget what really matters.   To get caught up in an ever-present and ever-growing to-do list that seems to get exponentially longer during the month of December.  There's baking and gift-buying and gift-wrapping and traveling (which means laundry and packing) and, and, and.    It's all to easy to ignore the kids or try to occupy them with a movie than to just sit and talk to them.

A few days after the baby shower, I was rushing to get some dishes done while my girls had breakfast at the table when I heard Miss E say, "Mommy?  Come sit by me."   At first, I said, "Mommy is busy doing dishes."  Then I thought, Are these dishes really that important that I can't take five minutes to sit, look at my daughters, allow them to be comforted by my presence and attention, and talk about what matters to them in this moment?   

I am looking forward to this month because as I write this, I'm preparing for a four week break from work.    I'm hoping that without papers to grade and e-mails to answer, I will give myself permission to use my free time in a way that honors my little blessings.

I know I will always battle my personality.   On one hand, God made me who I am for a reason---and being type A hasn't always been a bad thing (particularly when it comes to managing my diabetes and teaching), but it's also the devil on my shoulder.

I'm not going to let type A win this holiday season.  I hope you don't either.


  1. I am also a Type A personality. Looking back I know there were many times I should've stopped and held my son instead of trying to accomplish so much...laundry, dishes, cleaning, projects, etc. I learned my lesson on that after 6 years of infertility. Now that I have my daughter I'm not making the same mistake again. Yes, my house is a mess 90% of the time, at least 2-3 meals a week are of the somewhat quick/thrown together variety and most of the time the laundry monster looks like it might swallow the whole house....but I wouldn't trade it for the world! Enjoy your girls because it goes so fast. My almost 10 year old is proof.

  2. I needed this today! My son turns one the day after Christmas and we have 3 birthday parties this month. One with his birthfamily last Saturday, one at our home this Saturday and another on Christmas Eve with family 2 hours away. With Christmas, cleaning the house, wrapping presents and baking cakes I am stressed! I have to remember that it doesn't have to be perfect and that I need to stop and take a breath and enjoy this time. Thanks for writing this!


Comments are moderated and published upon approval. Your thoughts and questions are also welcome via e-mail at whitebrownsugar AT hotmail DOT com.