Dear Miss E and Baby E:
I'm so incredibly blessed to the one you call "mom."
I often feel inadequate to parent you. I lose my patience, I zone out, I daydream of a beach vacation. My days sometimes feel like I'm in one of those rotating doors; I do the same things over and over and over and wonder if it even matters at all. Laundry. Kissing hurt body parts. Dishes. Errands. Non-stop trips to the "potty." School drop-off and pick-up. Making meals. Sweeping up crumbs. Admiring artwork. Belting out commands.
Sometimes I have to take a step back and think about the fact that God knew you two (and your brother) would be mine....long before I was even born, or before I met your dad, or before I was told I had diabetes. And even right now in this moment, while all of you are napping soundly in your beds, God's plan is playing out.
What God calls us to do isn't always glamorous, easy, or clean, but it's almost always rewarding.
You two can say the funniest things. Do the sweetest things. Turn a tough day into a good day with just a look, a hug, a giggle, or a comment. You are both wonderfully beautiful in so many ways. I love tucking you into bed each night and reciting to you: "You are beautiful. You are funny. You are creative. You are silly. You are smart." It's all true! Both of you are so much smarter than adults, and you are only 4 and 2. You get what matters in life and you could careless about the things that do no matter. The world is yours! You can do anything, be anything. There are endless possibilities. You don't know yet to be ashamed or self-conscious or too scared, because you haven't yet had the world teach you those things. I savor this time of innocence.
Here's the deal: the world is going to tell you who you should and shouldn't be. And the messages will always be conflicting and depleting.
The Enemy wants you to believe the lies that are whispered to you through other people, through the media, through ANY means possible, any person, who tells you that which is contrary to what you are supposed to believe.
Remember the Taylor Swift lyrics I sing to you? I hope you will carry them with you always:
"Don't you worry your pretty little mind/people throw rocks at things that shine/and life makes love work hard/....they can't take what's ours..."
We, as women, must shush the voices that tell us we aren't worthy, we aren't pretty, we aren't talented, we aren't smart, we aren't capable. We have everything we need to succeed in life and we must learn and re-learn to say no to that which doesn't nurture us.
Remember---I can do ALL things in Christ who strengthens me. ALL things.
I hope that what I do for you, each day, is enough, and that you always keep Philippians 4:13 as your foundation.
I can't wait to see what you do with your lives!
Happy, happy Valentine's Day, my loves!