Dear Sugar: Meet Meghan Joy Yancy, Mom of a Big, Beautiful, Multiracial Family

Dear Sugar:

I have a mad mommy crush on MJY's Instagram account. Every day, she's posting a photo of her gorgeous family and of the must-own cool new products for moms and kids.  So today it's my honor to share my interview with her:

Lindsay Marcus Photography

Rachel:  How did you meet your husband?  What was it like dating inter-racially?   

MJY:  I went to cosmetology school after high school and had no idea how I would even meet my husband. And it's always cool how God works because I met my husband in the most unsuspecting place. I knew who he was, but was never really interested in him. I saw him around, but was not into him. He was my brother's teammate on their college basketball team. We saw each other out one night, began chatting via Facebook and quite possibly began falling in love the night of my brother's wedding. 4 months after dating, we were engaged and we were married 8 months later. I was freshly 21 years old at the time and wasn't really aware of how the world viewed interracial couples. I just knew that I loved him. And that's all I cared about. When I began to see prejudice rear it's ugly head throughout the years, it was disgustingly surprising, but also has really allowed me the stretching room to rise above the haters. 

Rachel:  You and your husband have five children.  Obviously big families attract attention, but a big multiracial family?  Even more attention.  (In fact, that's my family too!)  Tell me, what are the biggest joys and challenges of being a big, multiracial family?  

MJY: It's so funny you say that because there are so many times we will be out and about in public with all of us and it is so blatant that everyone is staring at us. It often feels like we are unknowingly walking on a red carpet and all eyes are on us. It can feel awkward but most of the time, my husband and I just look at each other and giggle. I would say some of the challenges would be the remarks. I've been asked if I do daycare or foster care. As if it would be so odd for me to have 5 mixed race children. But really, the comments don't bother me by any means, but pave a way for us to have some great growth discussions with the kids. Some of the biggest joys are seeing each of their personalities come through. Learning their passions in life, what makes them tick and experiencing each of their unique attributes. I've watched my 8 year old daughter explain to another little girl why she is darker skinned and why her mommy is white. She answered with such elegance, grace and kindness. 

Rachel:  What's your approach when responding to nosy questions or intrusive (and unwelcome) comments?  

MJY:  I've always wanted to be super witty and make the other person feel ridiculously uncomfortable but I'm never quite quick enough to come up with something good. Instead, I usually just brush it off. I don't need to absorb someone else's nonsense and let it affect my mood. More often then not, we get many nice comments and loving glances, so it's not something we have to deal with too often. I run errands with just me and the kids often and I usually assume people just think I am the nanny. When people do ask if they are all mine, their response is shock and disbelief and they respond with some sort of "Wow, your hands are full!" or "Better you than me!" or along the lines of "Bless your soul." *Insert eye roll* and move on.

Lindsay Marcus Photography

Rachel:  Your website and social media seem to be all about one thing:  joy.  Tell me about how you chose a theme and how that theme manifests in what you do.   

MJY:  Well, my middle is JOY. It's been a part of me since birth and I've truly just always been aware and in pursuit of finding joy and living in joy. God has done some really cool things in my life and given me such a natural positive outlook on life and He has shown me the beauty in living with joy today. Right now. When I began putting together my website and social media, it all flowed very naturally. I didn't have to think about what it would all be about because it is one of the biggest part of me. Joy is always on my heart, always on my mind and something I am intentional about living in. I love being able to share that with others, and seeing joy manifest in their own lives. Maybe at first, beginning as something they need to really work at, and then, becoming a habitual every day part of their life.

Rachel:  What's next for your family?

MJY:  Prayerfully.... baby number 6! Still waiting on that and in the meantime, keeping busy with homeschooling, settling into our new house and I am currently working on writing my first book. It is all about finding joy in today and I'm really excited to see it all come into being. We will also be welcoming some exchange students into our home this year so it will be very fun for the kids and us to learn about some other cultures while also being able to show our own family culture to them. I enjoy keeping up with my blog, Instagram and my essential oil business and am so blessed I get do it all from home while raising the kids. 

Thank you for letting me be a part of this wonderful series. I love getting connected with other multi-racial families and hearing their experiences and be unified in our beautiful differences. I am honored to be amongst you all. 

  Meghan and her husband, Seborn, live in Minneapolis, Minnesota with their 5 childen (so far.) Although living in the cul-de-sac in their suburban town, they lead a slower paced life as Meghan has mastered the art of "No." They sit around for a family meal every night and ultimately end up sweeping the floors approximately 5-9 times every day. Life is beautiful and a blessing and they live that with certainty during a daily dance party. Meghan homeschools their children while running her businesses from home. She is currently writing her first book while Seborn works as an assistant principal and real estate agent. You will most often find them playing in the backyard in the summers or cozied up by the fire in the Minnesota winters.